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notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-17 12:00 am
Read This Is The Checkout Stand, Not Stand-Up
Today, it happened for the thousandth time, and I had to do something about it.
Me: *Scanning an item that doesn't scan.*
Customer: "Huh! Not scanning, eh? It must be free!"
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 11:00 pmRead Technically Half?
I swung by Subway for lunch. I got a footlong ham and cheese. I wanted to try their Chipotle sauce, but I also wanted regular brown mustard.
Me: "Can you put the Chipotle sauce on one half of the sandwich and brown mustard on the other half? I want both, but I don't want to mix the two sauces."
Read Technically Half?
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 10:00 pmRead Please Read The Content Warning We Beg Of You!
Me: "Oh, are you looking to set up an aquarium again?"
Customer: "Kinda. I have to replace my entire tank."
Me: "Did something happen? If you have issues with your aquarium setup, we can help."
Customer: "Not unless you have a setup that is drunk-teenage-son-proof."
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 08:00 pmRead The Couponator 52: The District Doppelgänger
Customer: "I'm going to go to your sister location this afternoon, and I will be complaining to them about you, aaaaand I'll be getting this coupon approved!"
District Manager: "I'm sorry to hear that, ma'am. I hope you have better luck at our sister location."
Customer: "Hmph!" *Leaves.*
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 06:55 pmRead Grease & Desist
Manager: "Yeah, everything's going okay. The tech had me clean inside and blow everything out."
I look over and there’s a can of WD-40.
Me: "Did he tell you to spray it out with condensed air?
Read Grease & Desist
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 06:45 pmRead Just Say It™
Customer: "I want the black Nikes."
Me: "Okay. Can you describe any more details?"
Customer: "It has the white swoosh."
Read Just Say It™
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 06:00 pmRead The Tail-Tale Sign To Wear Gloves
I grab one of the customer's bags and flick it open. I see a small object rattling about inside. I look closer, and my eyes go wide.
Me: "Ma'am, I think you might want to use another bag."
Customer: "Why?"
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 05:00 pmRead Next Time Bring Flash Cards
Me: "Hi, I'd like a meal five."
Employee: *Blank stare.*
Me: "That's a bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit."
Employee: "You want cheese on that?"
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 04:00 pmRead Has ID, Still No Idea, Part 7
A woman places a single can of beer on the counter.
Me: "Can I see some ID, please?"
She has her ID in her hand, but she doesn't show it to me. Instead, she slurs her words, saying:
Customer: "Where… where did I put it?"
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 03:30 pmRead VIP = Very Ignored Person
Me: "You did remember to order for [Sister], right? The whole reason people are here?"
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 02:30 pm
I see an email from Discover Card saying my replacement credit card was on its way because it has been reported lost/stolen.
I think, "That's strange, I don't remember doing that. Is this a phishing email?"
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 02:00 pmRead Sadly Common Withdrawal Symptoms
Customer: "Why do you need that!? I have my bank card! Everyone here knows me!"
Me: "I don't know who you are, so I need to see it."
Customer: "Well, I don't know who you are, and I'm not wanting to see your ID!"
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 01:45 pmJust read the taxi ride roundup. A couple of decades ago when I traveled regularly, I was on an emergency work trip that involved a couple of airplane changes. Things went wrong and I ended up missing a couple of flights, but eventually got to destination city just as the airport was closing for the […]
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 12:45 pmMany companies require you to register, to see what they offer and at what prices. We registered with one, and after looking into it, decided that they had nothing to offer us (our business). So I hit the “Unsubscribe” button on their regular email. I hit that button on their their next 3-4 emails, and […]
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 12:00 pm
Me: "I'm sorry, your order won’t be ready until 10 AM."
Customer: "Well, I want to pick it up now, since I am already here."
Me: "It's not ready yet. The cake decorator won't be in until 8 AM."
Customer: "I want to pick it up now."
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 12:00 pmnotalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 11:00 amnotalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 10:00 amnotalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 10:00 amRead Yes, But Only The Letter ‘E’
I was at the Info desk during the rollout of the proprietary e-reader and was wearing a "eReader Certified" badge.
An old lady came up to ask a question, saw the badge, stopped mid-sentence, and said:
notalwaysright_feed) wrote2025-12-16 09:00 am